Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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