I just made out with a guy for $7.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
