Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
