she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
