I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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