Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
