oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Randomize
