Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
