I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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