I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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