Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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