About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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