she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
