You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
