LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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