i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You can't just leave with hair like that
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize