Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
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