covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
