just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
