No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
