wat bout pragnant strippers??
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
