What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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