Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
