Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
