That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
