The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
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