Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize
