We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
