I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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