Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
BRING THE BAGELS
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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