R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
she peed on how many people?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
