it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize