the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
