who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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