Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize