doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Dignity is for republicans.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
