**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize