What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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