It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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