bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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