we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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