I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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