Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
