I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
There r osticjed everywhere
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
