How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
