please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
