At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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