"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
