It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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