what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
